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Sunday, August 28, 2011

Closure

One of the subjects in the book I am currently reading is Closure. The writer of this book talks about how she needed closure from her Dad, but he had died, so there was really no way to get it, except to write a letter to her father. Obviously he wasn’t going to be ready the letter and the letter was simply for her. Well….the closure I need is from someone who is still very much alive, but because he doesn’t exist in my life anymore, isn’t it the same thing as a death? Technically, he is dead to me now. It’s someone I used to see every day and every night, but now I never see him, never talk to him, never even hear anything about him. So in some ways, it’s like he did die. So….I did what the author of the book did, and I wrote him a letter. I told him everything that I was feeling, why I was so mad, how I felt betrayed and abandoned by him, and then…..I forgave him. Honestly, it’s very therapeutic. Even though I knew the whole time I was writing it, he would never read it, it still felt good to get it all out. To {in a sense} release it to the universe. Hopefully it will help me to let him go {even though he’s been gone a long time now} and move on with my life. It’s a new season {almost} and it really is time for me to make some changes in my life. Please pray that I am able to let all this hate, anger, sadness, bitterness, and regret go….because it really is holding me back from being who I’m really meant to be & from reaching my full potential.


I got a call yesterday afternoon from my Mama. She told me that my little Jack Russell Benny had gotten up underneath the hay cutter and had lost one of his little legs. I was so upset and honestly sick about the whole situation. You see, my Dad had been driving the tractor with the hay cutter on the back, and he usually tries to watch for Benny, but Benny had been trying to dig something up, so my Dad couldn’t see him. Long story short, my Dad is feeling really horrible about what happened to Benny, but all of us have tried telling him that in no way was it his fault. These things just happen sometimes and the best we can do is pray about it. After I got off the phone with Mama, I immediately prayed for our sweet little “Benny-Denny” {as we so lovingly call him} and my prayers were heard loud and clear. Benny is going to be just fine. They had to remove what was left of his leg, but he is going to come home tomorrow. For this, I am so thankful. I don’t think we could handle losing two dogs in one year. That would be just too much. So thank the Lord for answered prayers!



Hope everyone has a fantabulous week!



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